Teens And Domestic Violence / A Woman's Perspective

 Most people are capable of simply ignoring truths that are uncomfortable and unpleasant. Denial is often easier than admitting just how much darkness is in the world we live in.
I am guilty of trying not to focus on the atrocities happening to women and children in foreign countries.
 How can we stay in denial about events that are close to home,,when our communities make up our 'home'.

There is a serious issue regarding teens and domestic abuse. For those who find this impossible to fathom, take a couple of minutes and google the topic in your area. The results will probably surprise you.

We live in a world where 'tweeners' speak quite openly about 'dating' someone. Granted, their definition is different from the adult definition, but they still think of themselves as having a 'boyfriend and a relationship'  This boyfriend is someone the girl, who could be as young as 12, likes (a lot), listens to, and wants to keep happy. A twelve year old female with raging hormones and emotions can become quite attached to a twelve year old male who is confident enough to show her the right amount of attention. All she knows is that the attention feels good (emotionally) and the other girls are impressed. The young man is learning how good he feels (physically) and,,his friends are impressed also. The issue of abuse usually arises when the young man is from a background where aggressive, possessive, and/or dominating behavior is a part of his life. He will likely practice what he has learned from the men in his world.
The occurrences of teenage domestic abuse reaches a peak between the ages of 16 and 20 years of age.
If the young woman finds herself in a 'relationship' with a boy who displays these types of behavior, and it is also a part of her life, it is possible that she will keep quiet because she thinks this is normal behavior.

The signs are similar to abusive behavior in an adult relationship. The boy's insistence on knowing where the girl is at all times, by constantly calling. The anger displayed when she does not answer the phone. Bullying the girl into doing something she does not want to do, such as 'sexting', or defying her parents. And yes, physical abuse is quite often present.

* Monitor phone and computer use.
**Know your children's friends.
**Meet the parents of their friends whenever possible.

If you have family members,,,children, grandchildren, younger sisters, or friends, it is worth your time to find out what the red flags of teen abuse are.

* Always keep the line of communication open and active with your children; both girls and boys.
* Introduce different scenarios to your children as a way to discuss topics that might be uncomfortable for both of you.
* There should NEVER be a topic too embarrassing or uncomfortable for you to talk to your child about.
*Educate yourself before you attempt to address any issue.
* Approach your child with the confidence of a parent. They will immediately pick up on any nervousness or fear.
* Remember that you are not a police interrogator and your child is not the suspect of a crime.
* No matter how hard it might be, take the time to listen to your child; that means stay silent.

As much as we would like to, parents are unable to protect our children from every possible danger.
The best parents can do is stay aware, involved, and observant.
And above all else,,,keep your children covered in prayer.