Reality of Celibacy / This Woman's Perspective

It is not an easy decision to make a personal commitment to practice celibacy. We live in a world that is obsessed with sex. Anywhere you go,,everywhere you look, sex is a factor.  Anything relating to sex is an almost guaranteed money maker,,,no pun intended. Add that to the fact that God made us sexual beings, increases the challenges that are inevitable,,at least for me.

All of the events surrounding my divorce along with the emotional challenge of my Lupus, sent me running to God's loving embrace. My head, heart and spirit were a complete mess. The rejection of a spouse by way of infidelity destroys a woman's sense of ,,being a woman. I strongly believed that I was unattractive and undesirable and unlovable.
Thankfully, when God taught me how to love myself, I understood just how wrong I was.

During my time of healing, I made the decision to practice celibacy. I was of course trying to live my life according to God's will, but honestly, I knew how fragile and inexperienced I was regarding the world of sex, unless I was married to that person.
After entering the world of dating for the first time at the age of 50, I quickly realized just how clueless I really was. When I realized that men generally expect sex after a couple of dinners, I decided to step back from the process.

I have always believed that the sexual experience HAS to be better when there is an emotional connection between the two people. Not just physical chemistry, but a kinship that goes beneath the surface. I suspect that most women feel the same, but since men seem to be the total opposite in their view of sex, women often feel they have no choice but to comply with the needs of the man. Plus,,there is also the fact that God made the sexual experience one that is generally one of pleasure.
I am also convinced that women are much more sexual than men because of our ability to own our feelings.

As with most decisions that require focus and discipline, there are often moments of weakness when your body might engage in an all out war with your convictions and truth. If that happens, and you step across a line you have given yourself, seek God's forgiveness, forgive yourself and,,,continue your journey; stronger from the experience. 

There are also times when you debate with yourself about the relevancy of your commitment. This usually comes up if a man who seriously peaks your interest, crosses your path. You are once again face to face with,,your free will.
When you look around and everyone around you is living a life that is filled with physical intimacy, it is not easy to be true to your personal beliefs. It is not easy to be alone in a world that often seems to be designed for couples.

I have met many people over the last 12 years that honestly believe that it is impossible for a person to be celibate and content at the same time.

Each person must dance to the beat of their own drum.
We will never have the option to judge the choices of another person.

It is indeed possible to be celibate,,and content at the same time.
As my faith grows, so has my ability to live my truth.
For me, whatever God places on my heart, He also gives me the strength to make happen.