It is official.
According to the U.S. Census Bureau, I am officially an Elderly woman.
I have yet to figure out if that means I am now a step beyond a Senior Citizen, or they are one and the same.
The day after my birthday, I asked myself whether I felt any different. Much to my surprise, the answer was yes, but not in the way I would have expected. I was immediately immersed in a zone of deep reflection. Six decades to reflect on, can be quite an experience.
I have decided to share a few of my thoughts on various topics....
Being a Single 65 Year Old Black Woman
Well first, I will admit that I did not expect to be single at 65. I did not expect a fine Black knight to come in and we both ride off into the sunset on his Candy Apple Red Harley.
Okay, okay, I did not exactly expect it, but the image did make a great storyline and dream material....
Of course, in the light of day, reality becomes just that...reality. I have written several blog posts since 2012 sharing my thoughts on being saved, single, and waiting on God. I have a very hard time imagining the opportunity to fall deeply in love and spend the rest of my life with a man that God has chosen just for me. A man who will see me as a blessing from God. A man who will see me as a priority; not just an option.
But, I do indeed believe in miracles.
I consider my life to be a miracle.
However, during my deep time of reflection, I realized that very gently, very lovingly, God has prepared me to embrace and welcome His will for me. Totally, whatever that might be.
I thought I had already reached this special place of spiritual growth, but at this time in my life, I know with blessed assurance that my peace has reached an even deeper level.
It is truly amazing because I know there is more to come. We will never stop growing in Go, and He will never stop growing in us.
There is no greater love than the love of God, and I will always be a priority for Him.
That is enough.
So, thankfully, I am quite comfortable being in my own company. But to be honest, I always have been.
I appreciate and enjoy my freedom to come and go as I please.
I enjoy having the confidence, courage, and wisdom to say what needs to be said, and the proper time to say it.
How nice it is to recognize that those times don't come as often as some people think they do.
Sadly, too many elderly people seem to forget the importance of being kind and respectful of others. Some things simply do not have be said ,done, ,,or expected.
There is never an excuse to be rude; doesn't matter if you are 19, 29, or 89.
I ask God regularly to please keep me from turning into a grumpy, bitter old woman.
On the rare occasion when I lose my patience, I am deeply disappointed in myself, even if I feel justified. I would rather live the rest of my days with these feelings than to ' go off ' for unimportant real, or imagined reasons.
One of the greatest blessings that should be a part of the aging process, is finally being able to discern just what is important.
Lightens the heavy load of life.
Family
My view of family has changed very little over the years.
I have always accepted people for who and what they were.
It has never been necessary for my family to fit in a box that I have chosen for them.
I have never expected them to conform to my way of thinking.
It is not necessary to like a family member's attitude or choices in life, to love them.
Holding grudges and hard feelings will eat at the core of the person harboring the feelings.
There will be a time when the issue will become almost nonexistent, but look at how much damage has been done in the interim.
The more time that passes, the harder it will become to reconcile the differences.
There is never a winner., and the entire family suffers.
A person who seems to see only the negative in another person, usually needs to take a closer look at themselves, which I have learned over the years, is a full time,,, 24//7,,, 365 day job.
If a family member(s) is toxic, try not to judge them, but love them from afar. Since it is family, take time to look at yourself as well. Why not??
We must remember that while we share blood and lifelong bonds with our family, they are human, just like us and other humans. They have hopes, dreams, fears, issues, scars, and the ability to feel and cause grief.
A family member is in a position to support you,,,and,,, manipulate you.
Sometimes, things are simply not what they seem to be, but it is easy to get caught up in what we think we know about those closest to us.
It is important to keep our expectations realistic; for them as well as ourselves.
They are not perfect, and neither are we.
Just accept who they are, and pray they will do the same for you.
My family's dynamic is unique. But then, so are we.
But hey, aren't all families unique?
When we were all young, there were kids, a lot of activity, noise, and late, late nights.
Now, there is the calmness that comes from shared good times as well as shared grief....
.... deep powerful love that has managed to survive the maze of life.
This is Part 1 of my musings. I will post Part 2 tomorrow.
**I would like to thank my family and friends who have been encouraging me to return to my blog.
Health issues over the last couple of years have kept me away.
When I logged on, I was surprised to see that the views had reached 10,400, and I haven't posted in well over a year. That won't mean much to most people, but for, it means a lot.
I hope that my followers will be inclined to return.as well.
I am back
God is truly awesome.
Sammye Kaye
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