Building a viable relationship is hard work. Sustaining a marriage is even harder. I believe that the commitment of marriage solidifies the union by making it a legal, signed and documented binding agreement that is more difficult to simply walk away when things go wrong.This is especially important when marriages are faced with some of the more serious realities of life.
The core of a marriage is based on love, respect, honor and trust. When a marriage is faced with infidelity, the trust, honor and respect are often mortally damaged. The only emotion left is a seriously weakened love that is simply not strong enough to hold the marriage together indefinitely. Think of it as a cylinder and love is in the middle. Respect, honor and trust come together in a circle of security and support. Without the bracing of the sides, the love is left weak and defenseless.
Does this mean the marriage is over? No.
I have witnessed many women refuse to give up on their marriages. Some women feel their emotional and/or financial 'investment' is too high to simply walk away.. they are likely to stay.
Other women will allow their pride to rule their hearts, or they will listen to family and friends who don't necessarily have their best interest in mind... they will often leave.
A true friend will understand this is a decision the woman must make on her own...it is her life.
The discovery of the affair and the offending party's response will be a fair indication of his mindset. When faced with proof of his actions, and he does not hesitate to show genuine (?) remorse; he probably means it.
.
If he is smug and arrogant; accept the fact that these attitudes are difficult to fake.
Arrogance is not a facade.
If there is no proof, he will possibly just deny the allegations. Honestly, the integrity of a marriage is too important to risk damaging, based on suspicion alone. A mentally healthy woman can generally trust her instincts regarding those she loves. I say generally only to be fair. I have personally never seen them fail
.
When two people stand before God and make a promise, to love, honor, and cherish each other for life, why do we so often fail to make God the keeper of our marriage??
* No matter how much love there is, or how long the marriage has lasted, without God placed 'FIRST' in the marriage, the union will simply not be strong enough to battle the emotional storms of life.
Keep your marriage in God's hands at all times.
It is never too late to seek God's help and guidance regarding anything. If it is God's will, it will happen. But again, there is work involved. Sometimes, God allows events to happen that will get our attention, and bring us closer to Him. A woman praying for her marriage is focused and dedicated. She will grow in her faith no matter what the outcome of the marriage happens to be. She must be prepared to accept God's will; even if the season for the marriage has come to an end. God will always do what is best for us.
A person chooses to defiles their marriage because they are exercising their God given 'free will' to do so.
They must use that same' free will' in the desire to save their marriage.
It has always been and will always be about,,,a person's choice..
In order for respect and trust to be re-established, the couple must have a 'meeting of their minds'.
They both have to genuinely love each other enough to invest the time and effort needed to rebuild their marriage. God has blessed many people with the knowledge, experience, and compassion to help couples find their way back together.
Do not be afraid to seek the help of someone who will have an objective ear and voice.
Find someone who shares your system of belief.
Some couples have found that working with a married couple who are certified relationship/marriage counselors provides them with both the male and female perspective.
But,,it must be a joint effort. One person cannot, nor should they, do the work for both of them.
There must be truth and accountability.
There must be a genuine desire to grow together.
There must be forgiveness!.
There must be patience during the healing process.
True love is a priceless gift from God.
It is a treasure that should always be protected and respected..
It is not as fragile as one would expect, but it deserves to be handled with gentle care AND constant prayer.
YES, a marriage CAN survive infidelity,,,and with God's help, both you and your marriage will be stronger than before..
No comments:
Post a Comment